Inconsequential Ficlet
by Trianne
Pairing: Elijah Wood/Dominic Monaghan
Rating: PG15
Summary: Elijah is chatty.
Warnings: Suspect humour and bad language
Disclaimer: I do not know any of these people. No profit is made nor offence intended.
"Dominic.. Have you ever wondered if the Earth is merely an atom in the thumbnail of a giant?"
"No, I can't say I have ever wondered that, no."
"Never? Oh."
Dominic wishes, not for the first time, that Elijah had never decided to broaden his knowledge and widen his horizons. Grief, the boy is already as bright as a proverbial button, what does he want to add to it for?
This month it was weird phenomena that had tweaked his curiosity – tales about spontaneous human combustion had enflamed Elijah's imagination to such an extent that if he got up to slash during the night he would cry out to Dominic to stay awake and listen out in case he turned into a Roman candle in the bathroom. That was amusing to start with, but after three consecutive broken nights Dominic said enough was enough.
Before that there had been the reincarnation phase (Elijah was Pharaoh's favourite concubine, apparently). Then there was the tarot card reading phase (Elijah would marry someone whose initials were FP and they would have three children – Dominic burned the deck on the barbecue).
The phrenology phase had been the best so far - Elijah "reading" the bumps on Dominic's head was quite nice, really, and most often led to other, more interesting readings of the body - but even so, Dominic had begun to wonder if he hadn't hooked up with some loon.
"But, Dominic, what if we are all living in a parallel universe? What then?" asks Elijah.
Dominic sighs.
"Then, my darling Elijah, we wouldn't know we were, would we? So what would be the point of thinking about it?"
"Oh, I guess you're right."
Dominic loves Elijah, that's a given. Elijah is all softness and strength, exuberant and erotic in just the right heady combination. But sometimes, just sometimes…
"Dominic?" Elijah asks, sheepishly.
"Yes? What is it now?" Dominic asks, gruffly.
"Do you love me? I mean, really love me?" Elijah has such a vulnerable look on his sweet, flushed face that Dominic has to smile, momentarily.
"Oh, God, Lije! If I didn't love you would I be fucking the living daylights out of you? Now shut up and be fucked!"
Elijah, his toes tickling Dominic's ears, sighs and smiles dreamily whilst his lover pounds away at his flesh, until Elijah fancies sparks must be igniting from the friction…
Spontaneous human combustion - not a bad way to go.
The End